Well, as you know, we reached settlement almost two weeks ago. So, my lawyer drafted the settlement document and sent it through. I signed it and passed it on to STBEH to sign too. I said to him that he doesn't need to spend the money to go to his lawyer, but that he could confirm with him that they agree with the document as my lawyer sent a copy through to them too.
STBEH was insistent that he wanted to go and sign it at his lawyer's office and after a lot of nagging finally had an appointment for yesterday, but then he returned saying that apparently the lawyer was stuck in court and the next appointment is only on Friday.
The bit that I don't get is why he's actually willing to spend the R900 to merely go and sign a document that his lawyer can confirm to him via email or telephone is ok?! In the meantime it still continues to drag the matter along and this is the other part that I simply can't get my head around. Surely by now he would also just want to move on and get it over with?
So, this has been my frustration for the last day (well, the last 10 days actually) and I'm just pretty annoyed by it all. On the face of things it's just another 4 days, but when things have taken as long as they have and all I need is a basic signature, I think it's fairly understandable that I'm feeling this way. Now I just can't help thinking that he's messing me around again and that it's yet another game, which in turn makes me feel like I should just avoid STBEH again and that after the atmosphere at Wisteria Lane has been rather pleasant and nice for the kids and us.
Hey, at least I have something VERY exciting to look forward to that's happening in exactly 2 weeks time today...
Madge
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just be patient. It's probably the most difficult thing he's had to do in his life. After all it wasn't a concented decision to get divorced. You do sound more optimistic about life in general though. Glad to see you're not blaming and shaming STBEH anymore. No point in fighting about it. You've got him by the short and curlies, it's just a matter of time, isn't it? just be patient...
ReplyDeleteSTBEH reads your blog and he knows it irks you when he drags his feet. Thats exactly why he's playing this out so long. It's to torture you. This probably was advised by his lawyer. These lawyers have a string of cases on their table and know how to milk it. The only person who wins in a divorce is, you guessed it, the lawyer. STBEH, stoopid, stoopid, stoopid, stoopid. You could be investing your legal fees in your childrens education!
ReplyDeleteIm with Anonymous 1. Jaric Im affraid I think that its bull that STBEH is doing this out of spite. Do you have any idea how hard this must be on him! He knows this is it, signing his family away..and not only that...his second chance of a happy family! Im not at all blaming you madge we both no it would be easier on every1 to get it over and done with but we all no how hard it is to let something go wen its not what you wanted or expected. As for the lawyer bit come on, we've all been screwed over in legal matters, you cant blame him for looking after himself. Im positive he cares about u and the children, he wouldnt of been so persistant otherwise despite how frustrating this is to you, and actually probably pushes you away because you probably have had to be a little cruel to get the message accross that he doesnt want to hear. He'll do the right thing by you and the kids just dont be to hard on him once things are signed. Just think about it, whether you think its his own fault or not, hes lost his family not once but twice and sacraficed everything it sounds to move to SA to start over... your all hes got. By the sounds hes not a bad person at the end of the day, you could of done alot worse! But you deserve to be happy and I really hope you can be. x
ReplyDeleteWhat a lot of collywoddle, bottom line is he is stringing her along and delaying the inevitable. Anyway i am more interested in what is happening in exactly 2 weeks.
ReplyDeleteOK, many opinions here and too an extent, I agree with all of you. At the end of the day, it's almost over and to be honest, I've waited so long, another few days isn't really going to make a difference in the grand scheme of things, although it would be nice to get it all over with.
ReplyDeleteThanks though, for voicing your opinions.
Always tough and drawn out these matters.
ReplyDeletePatience is a virtue. Looking forward is the best way. I'm with Charleen, what is so exciting in 2 weeks?