Taken things too far!

As I sit here right now I'm absolutely livid. I'm shaking so much from pure anger. I honestly don't know what's going on in STBEH's head. He's been on at me for the last 24 hours about reconsidering 'before it's too late', but then he does things that totally conflict with this.

I've had the whole spieel of promises that he'll change and make an effort and try to make this work. He's been back from London for three months and hasn't done anything to this effect consistently. He also said that he never knew that I was thinking about getting a divorce. So, when I said it in as many words, he still didn't know and when I returned a couple of days later asking him whether he'd made up his mind, he still didn't know. Bull Shit!

On top of it all, he's trying to put me on a guilt trip by threatening suicide. That is very much below the belt if you ask me. Mind you, the way I feel right now, I'll go to the pharmacy myself to pick up a container full of sleeping tablets and let him do us all a favor. I know that sounds horrible, but I'm honestly at my wits end right now. I'm so frazzled and totally beside myself. I really don't know what this man is capable of. What next???

Anyway, I think we finally might be getting somewhere as I know he went to his lawyer this morning. Please, please, please just hope or pray or do whatever it is you do that he has finally signed the settlement proposal so that I can push this forward once and for all and get this destructive person out of my life.

Madge